No.419

PEOPLE-WATCHING:

We’re all spoilt for choice on time-wasting activities in the modern age, from endless phone-based scrolling to Netflix-scouring, but people-watching is unquestionably the finest way to whittle away a few hours.

No subscription needed here – all it requires is a semi-keen eye, a park/high street/industrial estate you can lurk in and a dash of nosiness… you’ll easily lose an afternoon gawking at all the mad characters existing on the peripheries of society.

A man strolls with a parrot on his shoulder, while another wearing a pink fluffy cowboy hat rags his vintage Cannondale into a tree. An elderly woman has a conversation with a flock of pigeons, a bald geezer eats a chippy tea on a bench, fortified by a wall of Stella. Teenagers beat the living daylights out of a phone box. A group of ruffians share an odd-smelling cigarette, and a poncey, earpiece slickster watches in horror as his top-of-the-range smart phone falls into the gutter.

So who’s this lad then? Well, it’s not a coincidence you’ve never seen him about… he’s the people-watching-people-watcher.